By James Patrick
“The ultimate aim of ego is not to see something, but to be something without attachment to it.” ~Anonymous.
It goes without saying that in today’s world there are many factors which determine how we show up in our day to day lives. WHO we truly are may often be masked by an “alter-ego” in an effort to adapt to particular roles with friends, family or environments like work and social atmospheres. There are standards today that dictate who someone is “supposed” to be in order to be considered significant, money someone is “supposed” to make to be considered successful and things someone is “supposed” to own to be considered valuable. Yet, the truth is that everyone has a different definition of what significance, success and value is in their lives. So, the question becomes how we can alter ego to live authentically, keep ourselves in check and avoid being defined by factors that do not align with our true self and purpose?
- Define Your Role. You are one person within this infinite universe. Yet, the universe is still bigger than all of us. Focus on the part you play and what contributions you choose to make that will add value to your life AND the lives of others. Remember, that if there is not a balance of give AND take, then no amount of abundance or wealth is sustainable.
- Build Your Team. The late author and motivational speaker Jim Rohn states, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” So what is your sum? Do the people you surround yourself with challenge you and push you to be your next best self? Are there some within that circle that may need to change? You want to be lifted up and have the strength to do so for others when it is needed most. Successful minds breed success together.
- Everyone plays! There are no extras. Accept that everyone has a role to fill, plays a part and has the potential to do great things in this life IF they choose to do so. You are never bigger or more important that anyone else. Every life matters in this human experience. Be a support; serve as a mentor or perhaps a member of someone else’s team.
- Enjoy the journey. Each day set personal and professional goals to strive for and avoid getting hooked on the perfect plan. As you move forward, remember that there isn’t just one path. Sometimes it may also mean moving forward by going back to a path you’ve previously traveled. Life experience may have allowed you to gather the tools you’ve needed to finish what you once started. To take one step forward can mean taking two steps back. You’re still moving forward.
- Laugh and be vulnerable. One of the greatest strengths you have is the ability to laugh at yourself and not take life so seriously. Be willing to be vulnerable when life throws you a curve ball. Laugh, learn and own your missteps. It shows that you are human just like everyone else. You are willing to put yourself out there and be the example that some may follow.
- P.U.S.H. Yourself. Create Positive, Unique, Sustainable, Habits which put you into productive daily routines. These include things like proper diet and exercise. They will enhance your frame of mind, promote structure and discipline for your goals and motivate an authentic expression of self. The ego has no room to play because YOU approve and love who you see in the mirror.
At the end of the day, choose to wear the mask or don’t. According to Deepak Chopra, “Ego thrives on approval, wants control and is sustained by power, because it lives in fear.” Everyone wants to be seen and to know that their life meant something. The version of that self which will be seen depends upon how ready you are to release that fear, act and BE yourself versus the reflection of someone else.